Friday, June 7, 2013

Flash Fiction Friday




The Visitor
by Donna L Martin


Sadie sighed as she grabbed the broom from the corner and began to sweep the hard-packed dirt floor.  Dust bunnies danced in the light peeking through the cabin's log wall.  Every so often she heard the soft chirping of the crickets from outside the open window.

Sadie sighed again.  Oh how she wanted to go to the fort with the others.  Molly hadn't been feeling well though and Ma told her to stay behind with the baby.  Why did she have to be the oldest?  Ma was always making her look after the younger ones ever since they moved to the new territory last summer.  If she was younger like Zeke or Abby she wouldn't be stuck in this stuffy cabin with nothing but chores and a fussy baby for company.

She had been lost in thought when a strange sound made her tense in surprise.  Pa had warned her about Indian attacks but he told her they were too close to the fort to worry about such a thing happening to them. No Indian was crazy enough to attack a settler this close to the soldiers.

Sadie glanced nervously at the cabin door and the wooden slat leaning on the wall beside it. Maybe I should lock the door, Sadie thought as she heard the strange sound again. This time it was much closer. Dropping the  broom, Sadie moved quickly to the door but it was too late.  Her eyes grew wide in fear as the door slowly creaked open...


***Okay, it's your turn!  Have the others come home?  Is it an Indian attack?  Put your creative cap on and add a sentence or add a paragraph.  Continue my story or start one of your own.  Join the fun and see where this picture prompt takes us!***

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13 comments:

  1. Robyn CampbellJune 7, 2013 at 11:20 AM

    First of all, that pic told a lot before I even read it. As to the prompt and what you wrote, one word. Magnificent!

    I'm in revisions on a picture book and I don't want to sway my mind into this story yet. But hope fully, I'll be back tonight and I'll add to your story then. *waves peace sign*

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    1. Donna L MartinJune 8, 2013 at 9:44 PM

      Awww, Robyn, thanks! I wouldn't exactly say magnificent but I'm certainly glad you enjoyed it...;~)

      Thanks for stopping by and come back any time!
      `

      Delete
  2. janetJune 7, 2013 at 12:03 PM

    It might be her fairy godmother, but that story has already been told.

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    1. Donna L MartinJune 8, 2013 at 9:45 PM

      Lol, Janet...haven't you heard that there are no new stories...just new ways of saying the same old story? Maybe it IS her fairy godmother...;~)

      Thanks for stopping by and come back any time!

      Delete
  3. Christine M. IrvinJune 7, 2013 at 4:35 PM

    She barely had time to grab a nearby frying pan before the door swung all the way open. She as poised and ready to bash the intruder on the head, and almost did so, until she realized who it was. Dropping the pan, she ran screaming into his arms. "Uncle Jake! Uncle Jake!" She seized him tightly around the neck. "You nearly scared me to death."

    "And you nearly choked me to death," Jake said with the hint of a smile in his voice. "What on earth are you doing here by yourself?"

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    1. AnonymousJune 8, 2013 at 8:05 AM

      "Ma made me stay here to look after Molly while they went to the fort! It's SO unfair! I have to do ALL the work because I'm the oldest!" Sadie blurted. "But why are YOU here! I thought you were away, working on those new-fangled telegram poles?"

      "My work was done. I had to be on the team that set up poles to every major city west of the Miz-sippy River, and I just gone and finished it! So I came home ta you five!" Jake explained. "Two," Sadie grumbled.

      "I'm kinda angry at Mable too, right now, Hun. Is Molly better?"

      "Yes, why?" Sadie was confused.

      "'Cuz a'goin' ta the Fort right now!" Jake said, smiling. Sadie jumped up and down.

      ~~~

      How do ya like it Miz Martin? Purtty good, ay? ;)
      Erik

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    2. Donna L MartinJune 8, 2013 at 9:55 PM

      Hi Christine! I wondered if you would be joining me on this journey...:~) Good job!

      Thanks for stopping by and come back any time!

      Delete
    3. Donna L MartinJune 8, 2013 at 9:57 PM

      Way to go, Erik! You gave a nice addition to this story...

      Thanks for stopping and come back any time!

      Delete
  4. Robyn CampbellJune 9, 2013 at 12:23 AM

    Yikes. I'm still working away. But I see you got some great additions. Love Erik's! Hahaha.

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    1. Donna L MartinJune 9, 2013 at 7:04 PM

      Hi again, Robyn! I love it when others join in the fun...;~)

      Thanks for stopping by and come back any time!

      Delete
  5. Hilary Melton-ButcherJune 9, 2013 at 7:29 AM

    Hi Donna .. I think an Indian did come in ... and they befriended each other .. and the Indian made her life much more interesting, telling her about his world, lore, herbs and passing on some of his wisdom ... and her mother then got upset because she didn't want to leave their home and was happy looking after the baby, and the house etc ...

    Cheers Hilary

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    1. Donna L MartinJune 9, 2013 at 7:04 PM

      Hi Hilary! That's a nice twist to the story as well. There could be so many options...a distant neighbor, a local trader, a wild mountain man, a wild bear...lol...

      Thanks for stopping by and come back any time!

      Delete
  6. UnknownJuly 12, 2013 at 6:47 AM

    I almost added my own version. I'm with Hilary where the Indians came in and befriended the family while the hostile man of the house was away.

    Loved this!
    Clar

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